December 23, 2009

Snowbound horror

Rob Towers has been engulfed by at least 5 inches of snow this weekend. In an era when even a centimetre of snow seems to paralyse the country, this is surely life-threatening. And after a couple of hours flicking through the daytime television channels I can confirm that this is indeed so. My brain is numb – and I feel like committing suicide.

My standby channel of the BBC is a no-go area on Sunday morning thanks to the unspeakably dull Andrew Marr Show… so once I have overdosed on the lovely Sussanah Reid and got the fire going, I started flicking channels – it not being possible to get a Sunday paper after a light snowfall.

Puzzlingly it seems to be Groundhog Day for Sherlock Holmes fans via endless repeats on Sherlock Holmes weekend. But few, I would guess can stomach the great detective’s methodology for more than one hour at a time. Dave can offer you Top Gear repeats… Dave déjà vu can offer you – well, as the title of the channel might suggest, Top Gear repeats.

Elsewhere, other channels you may not know existed offer you old video clips of policemen fouling up, sportsmen fouling up – and the chance to bask in other people’s misery thanks to the world’s deadliest storms. Later on, I can warm up with Michael Palin in the Sahara. Or hear once again thanks to Sky Sports News what a terribly pressured job it is being Manchester City manager and receiving a multi-million pound bonus and being sent on holiday for spending £200 million rather badly.

Personally, from what I have seen so far this morning, working on a rescue truck in a Canada ice storm seems just a little bit more pressurised – and presumably not quite so well rewarded.

But to the multiple national crises of a light snowfall in the 21st century – no transport, no schools, no hope… we must another gruesome national failing to a seemingly endless list. Mind-numbingly horrible daytime television.